i am circling around the idea of attempting to publish part of this blog in traditional print.

leave it to me to go backwards… most people are trying to go from print to cyberprint. not me, boy. that is one thing you should know about me, i usually do it bass-ackwards.

although if you really knew me you would know that i fucking LOVE paper. too much to describe. i cannot ever imagine that there would be no paper at all… sorry trees!! my best friend is all into paperless crap and she yells at me for printing stuff that i could e-mail instead. i can’t help it!! it also helps me to physically write things. like when i type, things sound cohesive and organized but when i write with ink or pencil, that is when the omg creative things happen. i could totally learn to love paper made out of hemp instead of trees. i love textured paper so that might even work out nicely…

anyway i have used amazon exhaustively to find out how many blog books there are so far. i have found i think nine books that contain blog posts as a major part of the material. only two of them are of a single blog totally; the others are mix tapes.

i made a list of the publishers and saved it on my hard drive. just in case…

(i fully intend to compensate the other girls for whatever of theirs i use, btw. i am not an asshole like that. but do i need a lawyer to figure that part out?? i don’t want anybody to get gypped because i’m too naive to know what to do.)

every time he touches me there it just gets better and better…

who would have believed that it was possible to be with one person for a long time and even doing the same thing and it feels different every time??

orgasms are the very best thing ever.

am i totally horrible for logging into my mom’s email account to find out what she ordered me for my birthday?

i must know dammit!!

if it is any consolation i did actually almost cry at the sweetness of it… and i promise to act as surprised when i get it as i was when i found out what it was…

you people have me worried, really worried…

nary a comment on the inexplicable increase in size of a male member with which i have been rather close for quite a long time now.

HOWEVER
one post about red meat and look at the nutritionists come out of the woodwork!!

i am glad that you guys can relate to the steak thing. does that mean i’m all alone on the size issue? or possibly i have just drained all the sexiness out of this blog and you guys therefore don’t know the topic when it does bite you on the ass.

it is almost my birthday. yay me!
not a physical vampire, probably an emotional one tho.
*smooch*

there are times when i know that i am a carnivore.

if i go too long without eating some red meat, i mean REAL red and REAL meat (i.e. rare steak), i start to freak out a little bit. i can handle it for like a couple of months but after that something has to moo for me or i just can’t function. i think it is the iron more than anything else. but i have tried taking iron pills and it is NOT the same. i know it isn’t protein because i eat chicken and fish and i give blow jobs. but none of that will fill the void.

it nearly always happens around my period too, but just not every single month. as long as i have been eating a couple of servings of bloody red meat a month, it doesn’t get out of hand. but steak is not cheap, and i am, and so is boy. so it is hard to eat it very often. i am also kind of a steak snob (entirely boy’s fault). i used to not know the difference between choice and prime, but boy fixed that by taking me to the local italian butcher for a porterhouse. i have not bought a piece of meat at the supermarket since that day…

i have tried to explain this craving to boy, and he pretends to understand. but i think he thinks it is of the “i am craving chocolate chip cookies” variety, which it is NOT. it is probably more akin to a pregnancy craving, where i have heard some women say that the food they want consumes their thoughts until they get it.

sort of like men with sex.

okay, that is how i can make him understand… the way that men cannot function unless they get laid, i am useless until i get a bloody steak. yeah. he should totally get that.

like it started thursday, and i have literally thought about it at least once an hour since then. i did buy two steaks this morning but we have both been sick and did not feel like cooking them. a few hours ago i found myself eyeing them hungrily and actually weighing the odds of getting bacterial infection from just eating it raw… i wondered if i would like the taste of it.

do any other women know what i am talking about? i have only one friend who claims to understand this… am i a vampire?